reading on the bus

So. I take the bus to work now. Venice & Inglewood to 2nd & Arizona, I enjoy the trip a lot. I used to just sit on there listening to music and examining the fellow travelers. So many senoritas with little offspring riding the bus too. I love the little ones, how they laugh and smile at everything. I just stare at them while the make it through the aisle. Sometimes they smile at me, sometimes they don't and it really makes my day when the smile at me. Sometimes I try to make a charles manson face but it doesn't always work.

Anyway, now I've learned the wonders of reading on the bus. When you look like you're really into a book or can actually block out the madness people seem different. I used to feel weird when old ladies had to stand on the bus and I wouldn't give up my seat. I mean, I got their first, therefore finders keepers on the chair, i get to sit their. Effin A. Now i dont even have to acknowledge the old ladies who want my seat, I get to feel superior to them. You will not even get my glance, bitch! Take that to scheming hoes.

that's what I"ve been up to and buying new nerf guns. That will come eventually.

anyone i've ever seen wearing huge noise canceling headphones in public places

were always total douche bags.

...ation

Emancipation proclamation declaration masturbation radiation hesitation degradation constipation denotation gratification constellation justification adulation undulation demarcation formulation tabulation indentation maturation connotation irrigation pollination destination coronation abbreviation hibernation transportation cancellation creation equation donation station vacation nation

no online tools/resources were used for this list, only my good ol' noggin. ideally, this will be an ongoing list, so feel free to add to it as you see fit.

l8rz

end of the line

probably around december i started to notice a huge decline of brain activity and lack of simple motor skills in the new hires. sketchy mike, for example, was more then likely bi-polar. one minute he'd be bummed out about his pregnant girlfriend and the next he'd have me pinned on the kitchen floor trying to show me the latest wrestling or dance move or something else to cover up his blatant homosexuality. soon after, he quit. one of my favorite mike quotes aside from wanting his girlfriend to get an abortion was telling me that i was "too leisurely" in my work and then proceeded to finish whatever i was doing stating that "jesus hates the slothful." if twenty people are on the books, rather than eighty to one hundred, you would take your time too. either way i'm still getting paid until 11:00pm.

i don't understand it. i wash dishes. it's a pretty sweet gig for $11 an hour and the majority of the time, i'm usually eating, walking around center city, drinking arizona tall cans, occasionally napping, listening to my ipod and lying about a vast amount of my work hours. i'm not looking for scholarly discussion by any means. eddie is probably the only other dishwasher who isn't retarded. he's got a real job doing video production work, so he just comes and goes as he pleases for extra cash. great hustle. he said "somehow this job brings out the absolute worst in people. " which is completely true, some wiener quit a few weeks in less than 60 minutes over a smoking dispute. as for bruce, or as i call sweatpants. he's nice but, he can't be real. he HAS to be a figment of my imagination. today he plans to do ecstasy while at work and if i decide to go in, first i'm going to break a whole bunch of glassware and secondly i'm going to blast danzig. he recently got his friend steve a job. this kid is also cut of out the same cloth. what really bums me out about him, is that he's got his neck tattooed. it's nothing cool either. its his fucking initials and they're really small. fuck, if i got my neck tattooed, it would take up the entire side of my neck. if you get your hands or neck tattooed, you should be hard as nails, but no. steve is a total nancy.

the next post will be all about bruce and mike's views on life, love, and vigilante activities.

Billy Mays

If I ever meet Billy Mays, I know what I'll say to him. I'd tell him he was the reason I grew a beard. And, would he like a documentary made about his awesomeness.

People seem to like chuck norris these days, I don't know why. Billy Mays is clearly superior to him. Ever see chuck scream about a cleaning product so much that you feel you just have to buy it? Didn't think so.

Long Live Billy Mays.

Boxer briefs

I don't know about your current underwear preferences, but I wish I tried boxer briefs earlier. They seem to solve my problem of the top of my asshole being exposed. And they're not nearly as tight as I thought they'd be. They're not loose, but they're not tight. They're super.

If you're looking for a change, try boxer briefs for a couple days.

salut.

PEPPERONI PIZZA HOT POCKETS

i don't know why or how, but these are so addicting. my favorite small meal/snack as of lately.
eating 3 boxes in a matter of 16 hours probably isn't good for my cholesterol. i'll figure it out sooner or later, i think i'll eat as many as i can to be a contestant on wing bowl next year.